-->
ThoughtsOnline

Monday, January 15, 2007


Rise and shine, it's 8 AM and Jack has but twenty hours left to save the country (or at least what remains of it).

24 PLOT SPOILERS - READ AT YOUR OWN RISK

There was a lot in tonight's episode that was pretty weak, but not a whole lot that rose to the level of qualifying as a bona-fide 24ism...

* AAAACHMED has the money hidden in a wall in his family's living room, just waiting for a call to dig it out and take it to some guy who just happens to have the nuclear trigger device? And it's (pre-price hike) just the right amount of money to purchase the device?

* And why does Fayed need to have AAACHMED have the money? Fayed doesn't seem to be short of anything. He's arranged to bribe the sergeant, he has whatever money he needs to rent warehouses and safehouses and feed his group... yet he appears to have run out of the cash he needs to buy the most important thing of all and has to have AAACHMED do it for him? What, with all of Fayed's technological prowess, he couldn't have hacked into Citibank's ATM network. Or go about getting the cash the old fashioned way, robbing liquor stores and gas stations? What, he's not worried about CTU stopping him, but he worries about some liquor store owner with a shotgun?

* CTU, once again, fails to try and track the cell signals of the handler or of Fayed.

* Jack's healing powers extend to the car, where the damage he incurred smashing into the handler's car has mysteriously healed by the time Jack hooks up with the folks from CTU.

* Wouldn't Fayed, who definitely thinks of himself as one of the smarter-than-average terrorist ringleaders, have thought to have gotten his hands on all the necessary components a bit earlier? And shall we presume that, as there are supposed to be four more of these devices somewhere in the country (although we know the key to finding them all will be in LA), that Fayed's cohorts are going through similar machinations trying to find the necessary devices?

* The fence (or whatever he was) in the warehouse sure didn't seem the type of guy who would know someone who would be able to get such a device. Did he know what he had and how valuable it was, evidenced by his raising the price? If he did, then he was pretty cavalier in showing it. And to make things worse, at least for him, after showing the dad what he had, and knowing the dad was desperate, he turns his back to him? Only on 24.

* And it's a 24 staple that guys in the dad's position always think the terrorists are going to let them and/or their family go. Obviously the dad never watched last season's 24, where the machinist was murdered notwithstanding the terrorist's promise to spare his life.

* Jack has been out of the country for 20+ months, yet doesn't need anyone to explain to him what Palmdale is. And have we filled up Guantanamo to the point where we had no choice but to start holding detainees on American soil, just right where the ACLU and the other terrorist-enablers need to gain access to the courts?

* Fayed knows the exact number of detainees being held at the detention center.

* Numeer (name right?) is able to hide in the bus bathroom without any of the MPs realizing what he was doing.

* All the detainees have their hands bound as they're shown waiting for the buses, but Numeer (?) has his hands free when he's in the bus bathroom.

* The military has such lousy procedures for handling and transferring detainees that they don't call for anything more than a crooked sergeant to falsify a headcount? No coded armbands, no double counting, no counting of heads as the detainees were being put aboard the plane?

* The terrorist who blew himself up: he was going to the storage shed to get what? It was full of ammunition and explosives, but when you're looking to explode some nukes, why bother with the 'little' stuff? If he was going there to get the laptop, why? Why would it have been there, why wouldn't Fayed have already gotten it? And, as Numeer was certainly able to arm the nuke without that particular laptop, just why was it so important for the handler to go there? And if it was important, why send the handler of the suicide bomber, instead of someone else?

* Assad: yet another terrorist who must have taken correspondence courses in reading schematics to nuclear weapons? What do these guys do, sit around and study these drawings just in case they happen to come across one some day?

* All the effort to set up and organize 11 weeks of terrorist attacks across the country all to get one guy out of custody? There's nobody else in the entire terrorist world who has taken the requisite courses in arming nuclear weapons?

And the clocks ticks and ticks and it is now 9 AM:

* Just as every terrorist seems to have a Masters degree in reading schematics of nuclear weapons, so too must they have all attended the legal seminar where they were told to always get the immunity in writing.

* A pretty fancy binder that Jack gives to Assad with the Presidential pardon. Do CTU tactical teams carry spare binders and clips just in case they encounter a terrorist the President wishes to bestow immunity upon?

* The fellow detainees of Palmer's sister's boyfriend: just blabbing away about plans to trigger nukes on American soil?

* AAACHMED waits just long enough before shooting the kid (Stand up! Turn around! Kneed down!) to allow Jack and the tactical team to get into position. Why doesn't anybody ever follow Eli Wallach's advice in The Good, The Bad and The Ugly: "when you come to shoot someone, shoot. Don't talk"?

* The kid doesn't ask how Jack knew that AAACHMED was holding him hostage, but (seemingly) assumes that it was his mom who called 911.

* OK, Curtis has issues with Assad, but he certainly went about it in the wrong way (duh!). He confronts Assad with everybody (and particularly Jack) still around. Apparently, Curtis never got around to watching TGTB&TU as instead of just shooting Assad, he talked and talked and waited and waited.

* Buchanan offers to send a car for Jack. Wasn't an entire tactical team and all their vehicles already at the site?

* And less than twenty minutes to reprogram a nuclear weapon's arming system and to trigger the weapon?

* And the Russian-designed nuclear device has a simple switch trigger that instantaneously sets off the bomb? That's to be expected of the I-want-to-be-a-martyr crazies... but I wouldn't have expected the Russians to figure their carriers would be of the suicidal type.

Here are the 24isms for 8AM and 9AM